Can't Eat or Sleep...already!

ok, so i know that we are just at the very beginning stages of this adoption process but every day is one step closer. i can't even begin to explain how excited we are. it was so amazing how much confirmation we received yesterday about choosing the Domestic route for our first adoption. which of course means everything is going to happen a lot faster. which i am totally ok with. i'm scared to death and overwhelmed with joy at the same time. going the domestic route will probably take us about a year so it is a lot more like being pregnant. now, i have never been pregnant but my mind cannot stop wondering about what baby God has already hand picked out for me. how big is he? what colour will his eyes be? will he be a chubby baby? will it be a boy? will he be healthy? will he be smart? will he like me? will i ever be able to convey to him how much i have loved him even before i knew who he was? but you know what....none of that really matters cause he will be mine! i already can't eat or sleep. all i can think about is how quickly can this happen. is my baby already conceived? what will his birthmom be like? is she healthy? i just find myself praying for her all the time. i pray that God would protect her from everything. i pray that she would find favor with her family and that they would support and love her. i pray that the doctors would treat her well and would have wisdom with her situation. i pray that we can be a light in her life even without knowing her.

but for now we are about to be swamped with paperwork, medical exams, classes, trying to fit it all into our work schedule, and raise finances. yeah, finances. it's one of those things that i BELIEVE God will provide. just now it will need to be a lot sooner than expected. i'm just praying that God will give us wisdom of what to do and how to make those finances come together. i just keep telling myself "one day at a time"!

here we go!!!!!!

Ok, here we go. So after much prayer and conformation from friends and family, we have decided to adopt Domestically this first time around. Our need for a baby, being a part of the firsts, is so important to us with our first child. We have completed the preliminary application for domestic adoption and are waiting for the next step. In the office yesterday we were told that the next cycle for domestic adoption began October 10th. Yes, that is right around the corner. So you can imagine our thoughts and anxieties. Pray and pray often for us, we need lots right now. We will post daily as things change. See you again soon.

- brian

international or domestic?

Audra and I had our first meeting with Bethany Christian Services this morning. What a sweet time it was. Our questions were answered and questions were asked of us. The most important question was asked of us: When you envision your new family following the adoption process, what do you see? That is a question we had not asked ourselves. So that is where we stand. How do we answer that question? Well, here are our thoughts. We see ourselves with a newborn or as young as possible. We want to be a part of the firsts in this child's life. We want to instill our values and beliefs from the beginning. So how does that play into our initial thoughts of international adoption. Newborns are not an option, if only because of time constraints and waiting periods. 2 years or younger is the closest we would get. So that opens another door and another option. Domestic adoption, which has also been a desire of ours. We would continue to seek a child of race. It is unfortunate, but African American children are an option of last resort to adopting parents. They choose one of own race or bi-racial before they even think of a child of a different race. That saddens both Audra and I. So, is God leading us to adopt domestically? We ask for your prayers with this issue. We also ask for a quick conformation more than answer. The next cycle for the domestic process begins October 10th, just around the corner. Wow, how quick could this take place! We thank you again for your thoughts and prayers through this process. Keep an eye open for our decision and next step. We love you all.

- brian

our first meeting

You can see that I have posted the answers to the pre-clearance questions. I guess they did not see anything too wrong with them, because they have asked to meet us. Audra and I will be meeting with our case worker, Chris Troutt (female), on Wednesday morning. We pray that this will be the first of many. I believe this will be more informational than anything else. 8 am CST is when we will meet with Chris at the Nashville Bethany offices. Please pray that all that is discussed is to the glory of God. We thank you again for your prayers. I will let you know all about the meeting Wednesday afternoon.

- brian

believing

well we have begun the adoption process and we are so super excited that we can barely contain ourselves. it's funny because we have just started telling everyone that we have decided to adopt when in reality brian and i decided that we would adopt a long time ago. this is not a new concept for us. we've known from the moment that we met that we would eventually adopt kids. crazy that God worked it out that we could adopt them together. so acutally beginning to fill out paper work is just the next step of something that we've always known would one day come. we've been sharing our news with everyone and we love having the support of family and friends behind us. but in the back of my mind there is still a thought that this might not work out. God might close this door. he has closed many of doors in my life in the past few years and what's not to say he would close this one. now, i say that but i completely BELIEVE that God has laid this on our hearts to do and he will COMPLETE it. but...even if he doesn't he is still God. the hard thing about adoption is that it isn't like we are pregnant. there isn't a definite end in sight. it could be years before anything happens. and then again it doesn't have to be that long. i feel like growing up in africa has prepared me a lot for adoption. hurry up and wait was always our motto. that is the theme of adoption to. hurry and fill out this paper work then wait for it to be reviewed. hurry and make your decision so they can make us wait for theirs. needless to say i'm sure there will plenty of moments where this process will not be fun and at times it will seem like a dead end. but again, we BELIEVE that God will give us a child. i BELIEVE that will open up all the doors that need to be open.

i'm excited to have this blog to have a place where i can post (for all the world to see) my excitements and my frustrations with the corrupt world we live in. you would think that due to all the orphans in the world that we have we would have a much quicker way of putting them into loving families. and all that know me know that i have NO patience. none. God didn't bless me with patience. i am a go getter. if something isn't happening the way i want it to i'm gonna go get it. but in the past couple of years God has been teaching me more and more about waiting on him. maybe it was all for this very reason. maybe everything in my life has been preparing me for this process. i'm so thankful that God knows the bigger picture. so i sit here...waiting...in great anticipation and excitiment to watch work. i'm praying that he will make our adoption process like Paul in prison. he will just open the gate and we will walk through and his GLORY will be shown to all who are along the path.
-audra

Pre-Clearance Questions

As I said in the last post, we made it past the pre-preliminary application. Now we have to make it past the pre-clearance questions. I have added the questions that you might see them. I will also post our answers after I run it by Audra for an ok. The answers were e-mailed in moments ago, so we wait in anticipation for a response. This will be the first of many waiting periods. Patience is the request for the day. Thank you again for your prayers and words of encouragement. God bless you for your participation in this journey.

- brian

The Journey Begins

On Friday, September 12th Audra and I filled out the pre-preliminary application with Bethany Christian Services for international adoption. This is the application they require to see if you are worthy of moving forward with. Well, Audra said it would take about 2 weeks to hear back. You throw a weekend in there and it make take a bit longer. God is up to something, because we got our response on Monday that we were moving onto the next step. More on that in the next post. Our desire is a male infant from the country of Ethiopia. We will try to keep you up to date on all that is taking place within this process. Each post will be a new step, application, home visit, etc. All we ask of you are your prayers. For that we thank you in advance.

- brian