Saturday, August 8, 2009

domestic adoption

people ask me so often why we choose domestic adoption. quite honestly, domestic adoption chose us. we actually started with international adoption but once we decided that we really wanted as close to a newborn as possible, domestic adoption became the perfect choice. we have always knows we will adopt from all over so not going the international route didn't mean we would never adopt internationally, God just has us going a different way right now.

i also have people tell me all the time that we should be so lucky we chose domestic adoption because it is so much easier and safer. WHAT? how can you even compare the 2? it's like comparing pineapples to mangos. the only thing about them that is the same is that they are both fruits. there is no easier or safer from one to the other. i've walked and still walking with friend who have internationally adopted and i know that isn't easy or safe. but i've also walked with friend and i'm currently walking the domestic adoption road myself and i can tell you from experience that IT AIN'T EASY or SAFE! there is nothing easy about waiting and waiting and waiting and knowing your child is out there somewhere and trusting God to bring the right birthmother along to pick you. there is nothing easy about living life and then one day getting a phone call and your entire world changes in just a few hours. i'm not saying that i would want it any different and i'm so blessed to be walking this journey but it isn't easy. and i know that even once the baby comes it doesn't get easier.

with domestic adoption there is always the possibility of a relationship with the birthfamily. now, brian and i are praying that we can have a relationship with our child's brithfamily. we know people who have amazing relationships with their birthparents and ones who have not so good relationships. it can be messy. it can be wonderful. it can be time consuming. it can be inconvenient. it can be a tender. it can be tough. it can be so many things. i have no doubt that God will give our family the strength to walk down any of those paths but it might not always be safe or easy.

i don't think brian or i would ever do easy if it was starring us in the face. for some reason it always seems that what seems most likely and easy for others God has different plans for us. but i'm so grateful. i'm grateful and blessed to know that i serve a God who isn't in to making things easy but in to giving you His strength to walk through them. and that's why we chose domestic adoption this time.


Eric and Suzie Treanor said...

continuing to pray for you guys. blieving that God is bringing him to you guys soon :) :) <:/

Heather Childs said...

you have a powerful blog here, Audra! It has been awhile since I've caught up on my online reading:)

So true, about domestic adoption... there is no safe or easy path when following God's call. You can do everything 'right' in adoption and have heartbreak. You can do everything 'wrong' and have smooth sailing. And you're right - the adoption may be final, but your journey never ends. My experience with open, domestic adoption has been messy, oh-so messy... and it's right where God wants me. Deep in the mess, showing His love.